How long does surgical menopause last?

I haven't written in a long time and it is mostly because I have no idea what is happening to me. I just don't feel normal and I am not sure why. Yes I still have hot flashes but the Cymbalta definitely helps to lessen them as well as helps my bladder spasms. 

Here is the thing.. My nose, ears and mouth are completely dried up. My eyes perfectly fine and many tests that I have had came back negative for ANA/RA so no Sjogren’s syndrome, so I am completely confused and living in utter hell at the moment I would say. My inner ears are so itchy and sometimes its white and flaky which has never happened before. The other day I did notice almost a red ting to the ear wax. My mouth on the other hand, wow it just never ending thirst. I drink at least 4 liters of water a day and I just can't quench my thirst. I started to develop "Burning mouth syndrome" which I thought was from upping the Cymbalta but now I don't know what it is from. My nose has been dry the longest. It started when I was on the continuous BCP 2008 and it has never gone away. I have tried so many things and at one point I was told it was a tiny cyst and that was removed and now its the other nostril but it just seems dry and my nose NEVER runs even if I have cold.  

I have yet to take HRT because everything else is fine, I think. I am 38 and my hysterectomy was May 2014 so that is coming up to 2 yrs. I am utterly confused about this subject. I know that I am young and that I already have mild osteo in my jaw but am I setting myself up for more problems if I take it? My worry is heart disease mostly because it runs in my family and I have been having a lot of heart issues with anxiety which I truly think was brought on in 2007 when I was put on Lupron. I didn't think of it until now and it scares me to go on anything else which could increase my risk.

Seriously though, when does this end... When?  

If anyone has any suggestions or is going through the same thing I would be more than happy to hear from you :)

My Battle With Food

As long as I can remember I have had a love hate relationship with food. As a baby I would vomit everything up or I could feel it coming back up all the time with certain foods. I ended up with an emergency laparotomy at age 7 for intestinal volvulus, my small intestine started to grow inside the large one taking out my appendix was the only option along with a bowel resection.

When I was 15 I developed an eating disorder. I wouldn't say this phase lasted long (anorexia) but I know when I was getting my period the pain was so bad for at least 10 days I didn't/couldn't eat. I was around 110 lbs most of my teenage years. People would always comment on how skinny I was and I would just stop eating just like that. I never thought about it to be honest until later when Endo started to effect my bowels. The rectal pain was so bad I could not stand it. I started to hate food because food meant rectal pain. I had so many tests done and they could find nothing.

I started to gain weight during my pregnancy. At that time I was 23 yrs old and I had only eaten once a day before this so I started to eat more because I had to for my baby. Well I gained 75 lbs. It wasn't something I was aiming to do of course but I was already battling with Fibromyalgia and was in an abusive relationship so food is what I turned to.

By the time my daughter was 2 or 3 I had gone full out Binging and purging every single day.

During this time I was so sick with Endo but had not be diagnosed, I was nauseated all the time, I had migraines that would last well over 48 hours with the longest being 100+. I felt so sick and the pelvic pain was way to much to bare. During this time I did a colon cleanse as nothing seemed to work at all for the bloating and the bowel/rectal pain this was almost like it was something that was meant to happen because if I had not done that cleanse and suffered so much pain that the 10 cm Endometrioma would never have been caught.

I did find out I had stage IV Endo in 2007, deeply infiltrating, Rectovaginal cyst, Sigmoid colon Mensentric cyst which is rare. My insides were glued together and I had kissing ovaries. I had a PSN (Presacral Neurectomy) done at the same time and the one main side effect? constipation. YAY!

So for me I have never known what it is like to eat without pain because I always have it.

Since that surgery I have had so many complications and have been addicted to enemas for the last 4 yrs. I can't stop. They make me feel better when I am bloated or can't go it is just something I do. I hate myself for it because at first it was because of the pain now its both and now I don't want to stop. Nothing will ever stop the bowel pain I get. No surgery, nothing. My bowels from day one have not liked me. Endo sure as hell didn't help with that.

I was diagnosed with a Wheat, Dairy and Spelt intolerance and I know these effect my bowels a lot but when you are bulimic and you are on all these meds that make you want to eat anything and everything there is no way to stop yourself. I feel like I want nothing but whats bad for me and when I try to eat healthier things I start gagging literally. I am sure its because I have been on and off so many diets to help the endo and the though of some foods like lettuce makes me want to be sick. I will force myself to eat it but I do not like it at all. It is not like I don't like healthy food, but for me stress, endo and meds trigger such bad things and I feel like there is no control whatsoever on my part, I just can't stop.

I am 36 yrs old with an eating disorder that shows no chance of ever stopping. I have lived this cycle for so long that I wonder why I was chosen to suffer so greatly from birth. Why is my body so fucked up? Every inch of my body there is one problem or another and I want to scream my face off.

Well I haven't posted in a while and I will call today Confession Thursday lol.

Weight & Endometriosis

The battle of the bulge is what is what I like to call it. Chronic inflammation, Bloating, weight gain and pain.

We as Endosisters know all too well how much of a problem this is, how annoying it is and how painful it is.

I am Wheat, Spelt and Dairy intolerant so I do my best to remove those from my diet but really it is hard isn't it? I have tried every single diet known to man and there were very few that helped. Paleo takes away all grain and dairy and for me that did help with the pain in the bowels that I get but I still felt bloated.

The hard part with dealing with this problem is medications and hormones because you are constantly craving carbs and usually bad carbs and complete junk. Well for me that is the way it is for sure.

Since my first surgery in 2007 the same year I was put on Marvelon continuously after Lupron I have never been able to keep weight off and I am constantly bloated all the time. I don't get a period which is great but I hate feeling like I am pregnant all the time.

It has been 6 yrs now and I have been on at least one med that entire time so the chances of anything changing for me is minimal. I would say however I don't exercise because of the extreme chronic fatigue from the Endo and Fibromyalgia. I am tired and have no energy ever so I can see also why the weight seems to stay on.

Where does the weight go with you? Mine for sure is in the thighs, hips and Belly. Never to the place where I want it to go like my breasts LOL..

I know that Diet, lifestyle, and exercise are key to combating this problem but as any Endosister knows sometimes its just quite impossible and you get down on yourself. It is like a vicious circle.

What do you do to help with Chronic inflammation, weight gain and bloating?